10K Problems

10K Problems
Yuh
Niggas asking where I been at, I gotta recap it
Relapsing D.R.U.G. habits
Tryna move forward, depression been holding me backwards
Recovery ain't a straight line
What's going on like Marvin is
I heard through the grapevine that I'm falling off
I been on another planet, over they head with the last album still they didn't understand it
Now I'm in a panic, scrambling for relevance from a bunch of people that I consider irrelevant
The elephant in the room, is the music coming soon?
If it gets you on will you jive, will you coon?
Now I'm on 10 in this 4 corner room, dead inside like a baby that's aborted in the womb
Overpressured and undervalued, I'm never enough
I got a complex in believing I'm a f*** up
Then I got Complex feeding my demons and they read it and validate the reasons that I don't love us
I left my woman cause I couldn't keep this shit at home
You can't be good with someone else if you ain't good alone
See every girl that try to do me right, I did them wrong
But even dogs get tired of chasing a bone
I lash out with violence and deal with the karma
I broke a bottle on a ni*** head out in Toronto then got extorted for $10,000
Honestly that was the least of my 10,000 problems
My pops had a surgery on his neck and was paralyzed, It's a painful process watching your parents die
And niggas look at my life and think I'm in paradise, don't know the blood I spilled over these parasites
Shit is deeper than rap ni***, my right hand scammed me then framed the homie like a class picture
So I went and thrashed niggas then that ni*** twin brother called his brothers tryna come and clap niggas
So I'm ridin' round with the strap ni***
Beverley Hills police pulling up on me cause I'm a black ni***
Now I got this gun case, facing 1-5, a lawyer's fees can't pay my mama not to cry
Surrounded by homicide, I got survivor's guilt
Wishing maybe I'd be better off if I got killed, wishing planes that I'm on would crash
First class flight to an early grave, I'll be home at last
I'd just look at the microphone and laugh, would I have ever picked you up if I knew what I know in the past
Summer skies all overcast, if I don't make it to tomorrow then play this verse on my behalf
I told my whole heart